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Strings of Passion by ~sarahbean:iconsarahbean:



A thought,
A whisper,
You speak of unknown things.

You watch,
You see her,
We know of which you sing.

We speak,
We yell,
They hear our voices calling.

They walk,
They fall,
The battles they see coming.

The blood,
The gore,
All for just one woman.

All night,
All for
This raging hate of two men.

This here,
This girl,
Caught between the monsters.

Caught with fear,
Caught with hate,
She’s dying as they fight for her.

She’s hurt,
She’s crying,
The battle keeps on fighting.

They’re dead,
They’re falling,
Struck as though by lightning.

Struck down,
Struck hard,
She falls as her heart breaks.

She drowns,
She starved,
Between the two men’s graves.
©2006-2009 ~sarahbean
:iconsarahbean:

Author's Comments

Another old one. I was re-reading it a few days ago and just had to put it up here.

Comments


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:iconforgiver-03:
Wheeeeheeeheeee!
...yayayay!
That being said:
Were I the one writing it, I would say 'this raging hate of men' as opposed to two, just 'cause it flows better, which is the same reason I would shorten 'caught with hate' to 'with hate,' and remove 'for her.' Also, I would change 'keeps on fighting' to keeps on roaring, or some similar wordswap.
But that's just what I would do, and I am by no means an expert on such things.
I love it.
:iconsarahbean:
wow, goodness, wow. thank you! Your comment is just wonderful! really. and also thank you for the comment. I might rewrite it one of these days so that it flows better but for now I want to preserve the 'oldness' of it. I'm too sentimental, sometimes I make myself sick!

--
But that was when we followed men and the sky was made of clouds.
:iconforgiver-03:
I hear leeches cure that.

Details

January 26, 2006
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